We Can't Expect Pastors to Do Everything

As I was sitting in a classroom the other day waiting for the professor to arrive, I overheard a conversation between two classmates who are members of a different denomination. They were discussing a sense of frustration that needs were going unmet in their community and all the while expensive gifts were being lavished upon their pastors. The mention of new cars and offerings taken up in the middle of the service left me aghast. I wondered where I could sign up and if I could transfer my membership, like, yesterday.

The joke is that I love the Presbyterian Church (USA). Although I have been a lifelong member, it is seeing our polity at play and witnessing the impact of a connectional church that has led me to not only stay in the denomination, but passionately claim it as my church home. The PC(USA) is quite literally my family as both of my parents are pastors and many of my friends are in various stages of the ordination process as well. But it is this close proximity to church leaders that left me joking about how to switch denominations with my classmates. I most certainly do not think that pastors should be given lavish rewards while communities suffer, but the PC(USA) has fallen into a harmful, if not abusive, pattern in which our servant leaders are expected to sacrifice health and family in order to meet the expectations of congregations.

To be fair, churches come by this honestly. For generations congregations have been staffed by men whose responsibilities outside of their work have been limited. If the pastor had a wife and children, undoubtedly it was his spouse who was responsible for the majority of both the childcare and housework. As recently as 2015, the Bureau of Labor and Statistics acknowledged that women spend twice the time each day that men do in household chores, errands, and helping family members.[i] With these tasks cared for by someone else, male pastors have been freed to tend to the needs of the congregation as a primary caregiver. These expectations have become ingrained into our congregational cultures and governing bodies. We expect that our pastors will be available to rush to our side at the drop of a hat. We expect that pastors will take limited time off for vacation and ideally these vacations will be continuing education. We expect that pastors are present for all church activities and meetings. We anticipate that if these expectations are unmet we can reevaluate their terms of call or bring it to session. These expectations are no longer acceptable.

The face of ministry is changing. From 2007 to 2016, more women have been ordained than men in the Presbyterian Church.[ii] This, along with continued progress towards gender equality, means that our churches are no longer staffed by individuals who can count on someone else to pick up the slack at home. We must recognize that our pastors are whole people who live whole lives of which their call to serve a congregation is an important, but not exclusive, part.

This shift in expectations has proven challenging for the church. At the most recent General Assembly, commissioners were presented with the opportunity to provide paid family leave for pastors. I had the privilege to speak to the committee and witnessed the testimony of many pastors for whom a lack of family leave had caused irreparable damage in their call and personal health. Stories of women who were unable to fully recover from traumatic births. Of families seeking to grieve the unexpected loss of a child. Of pastors considering leaving their calls to care for aging parents. Rather than centering conversation on these stories, the debate quickly turned to how the congregation would fare in the absence of a pastor. Who would fill the pulpit? Who would lead session? Where would the money come from? Rather than view these as necessary hurdles and seek generous solutions from the church body, several voices identified these challenges as the reason we should deny paid family leave. Ultimately, the Assembly opted to investigate the issue for a later date. This is not the first time this has happened and, in the meantime, clergy are struggling to find space to advocate for their needs while congregations expect them to be present without fail.

The cost of these expectations is devastating for the whole of the church. Not only are pastors burning out, but in placing the load of ministry exclusively onto their shoulders we deny the gifts and calls of members of the congregation. The PC(USA) affirms that we are a priesthood of all believers, with each member of the church bringing unique and necessary gifts to serve God. Our outdated expectations of leadership have left members floundering to find ways to live into their faith. We cannot continue to risk the health of our communities by denying the full humanity of our ministers and the full call of our members. We must seek to reorient the church or risk losing the extraordinary spiritual gifts in our midst. Like any waterway, our congregational expectations have been shaped by years of repeated practice, but with enough of us gathered together towards a common goal perhaps we can be a rolling justice that charts a new path.

[i] “Charts by Topic: Household Activities." U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics. December 20, 2016. Accessed March 23, 2019. https://www.bls.gov/tus/charts/household.htm.

[ii] "More Presbyterian Women Ordained Ministers than Men 2007-2016." Presbyterian Foundation. Accessed March 23, 2019. https://www.presbyterianfoundation.org/more-presbyterian-women-ordained-ministers-than-men-2007-2016/.